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Global Warming Hoax Weekly Round-Up, June 12th 2009

It’s time for skeptics to smile again, the regular round-up of all things warm, toasty and positively hoaxy is here.

It’s a bumper edition this week, so a well padded seat and extra-large beverage is recommended.

Part One: Al Gore & Friends

Warmists were blessed for a second consecutive week when Profiteer Prophet Al Gore blogged.  I know that posting on a blog isn’t as dramatic as appearing on a mountain top with an armload of stones, but it’s greener, right?  Anyways, back to the Goreacle’s post, which recommendeth the Grist:

“The Alliance [ for Climate protection] recently brought on other veterans of national political campaigns: Steve Hildebrand, the Obama campaign’s deputy national campaign director, is working as a consultant for the project. Steve Bouchard, a veteran of the 2004 and 2008 Democratic presidential campaigns, is campaign manager for the Alliance. Brian Rogers, spokesperson for John McCain’s presidential campaign last year, has come on board as research director.”

Wasn’t global warming supposed to be about settled science?  It sure looks political when you look at the list above.

In awkward juxtaposition, Al’s beloved Grist issued a correction for an article on West Virginia.  And then another one, because Grist doesn’t know where West Virginia is, but it can tell you what to think about the climate.

Did the Gore Effect land in Melbourne, Australia?  I report, you decide.  Related, Gore’s speaking engagement wasn’t quite as non-partisan as it appeared.

From the not-at-all-funny-department, two Gore employees have been sentenced to hard labor in North Korea.  Al might go do something about that.   From the OK-I-can’t-help-myself-department, prisoner exchange?  Please?

repower North Korea?

repower North Korea?

Nothing screams planet-in-peril  ‘crisis’ like interpretive dance.  It’s a little known fact that every major crisis in history has needed a slideshow, $300 million in advertising, an opera and dance before it was taken seriously, right?  Oh, well, nevermind, this is Crisis 2.0 and it needs dance,  because the planet is doomed and it’s your fault.

Gore friend and aged hippie David Suzuki demonizes travel in order to make you think twice about leaving the house.  Some scary facts:

Almost every American will be injured in a car crash during his/her lifetime.

50,000 North Americans die annually in car crashes.

3,000,000 North Americans are seriously injured annually in car crashes.

Today’s average vehicle sold in North America gets worse gas mileage than a Model T.

Bus-ted

Bus-ted

An inconvenient fact:

Political activist David Suzuki — on a cross-country tour urging Canadians and politicians to drastically reduce greenhouse gas emissions — may want to look in his own backyard before lecturing Canadians on how they’re destroying the Earth. With all the alternative-energy modes of transportation out there, Suzuki and his entourage are crossing Canada in a sprawling, “rock-star-style” diesel-burning tour bus, emitting more greenhouse gases during his 30-day tour than many of us do in a year.

Part Two: AGW Scaremongers

Radical environmentalists are calling Canada a ‘bully’ on global warming.  Which is a bit like calling synchronized swimming a sport, if you ask me.

The UK’s Hadley Centre is calling for London high temperatures of 105F and vineyards in Devon.  By 2080.  Before you ask, yes, this is the same outfit that can’t accurately forecast weather a few days ahead.  But wait, maybe there is a new super-secret mega computer with all the answers.

Global warming muppet Jim Hansen, the death-train hatin’, power-station stormin’ NASA super alarmist is profiled at Climate Realists.  If science had divas, Hansen would be the fat lady.

The UN finds a war it thinks it can safely take on, against plastic bags.  Unlike Kim Jong Il, Mahmoud Imadinnerjacket and other nefarious characters, plastic bags are unable to ignore strongly worded letters and security declarations.  Forget about weapons of mass destruction, the UN has found a target worthy of its skill set, inanimate objects of convenience.

Burger King, I’m lovin’ it.

Have it your way

Have it your way

Continuing her quest to define the greens, Jennifer ‘Dian Fossey’ Marohasy this week discovers that “THE Greens consider themselves morally and intellectually superior.” Color me shocked.  Shocked, I tell ya.

Hippies and weather hysterics gathered together in Sacremento to commemorate the closing of a nuclear plant 25 years ago.  Meanwhile, Sacremento considers its nuclear future.

Aussie newspaper The Age gets its alarmist freak on, tells readers they’re doomed.  Again.

Readers might recall the TPM post that called for skeptics to be executed.  Well, the author of that piece apologized, sort of.  TPM preferred to take the memory hole approach and called the whole thing a ‘joke post’.  Because there’s nothing funnier than riffing on executing people who disagree with you.

Not getting the memo that it was a bad week to double down on stupid was joltin’ Joe Romm, who decided  a commenter’s idea to strangle skeptics in their beds wasn’t a threat but a prediction.  You will remember that Romm is the emotional warmist that did a good job of making Mariah Carey appear sane and balanced in his last encounter with arch-nemesis Marc Morano.

Some good news for fellow blogger Klockarman at Gore Lied, he got the Rommulan hate fevah directed his way.  Cool.  Maybe NASA will be on Romm’s hit list next?

Super-genius Nancy Pelosi went to China to talk about global warming and wrote a ‘what I did on my vacation‘ report for left coast readers.

Pelosi indicates her IQ

Pelosi indicates her IQ

Global warming alien insect invasions will destroy Britain.  Add it to the list.

Tom Nelson discovers how to write alarmist articles, just bury the facts.

Green groups including the WWF, Greenpeace and the David Suzuki Foundation wrote a Dear Santa wishlist for Copenhagen.  Short version: we can haz middle agez?

Getting ‘em young, the weather hysterics love kids, hate science.

George Moonbat, the Guardian’s hysteric in chief has honored the top ten climate ‘deniers’, in playing card fashion.  Exactly like the US military did with the most wanted Saddam operatives.  Coincidence, or a hit wish list?  Skeptic execution fantasy is the new black for warmists, so who knows.  Anyhow, kudos to the 10 that made Moonbat’s hate list.

governor-of-hotness

Hippie down?  My old adversary and hippie Friedgreen seems to have dropped off the planet.  Let’s hope he returns soon, I miss the comedy gold mine.

Run away!  Brave Democrats are distancing themselves from Waxman-Malarkey faster than the ice is melting in the arctic, and that’s fast.

Shhh, it’s a conspiracy, so don’t tell anyone that skeptics are funded by big oil.  Currently unanswered is the source for Al Gore’s $300 million advertising campaign.  I suspect that the scaremongers are better funded than skeptics, but that doesn’t fit the narrative.  Also, hey oil companies, where’s my cut?

Part Three: Inconvenient Truths

The AIT index continues to cool as the Gore Effect continues its global march to dominance.

Now even NASA says that It’s the Sun, stupid.

A study from NASA’s Goddard Space Flight Center in Greenbelt, Maryland looking at climate data over the past century has concluded that solar variation has made a significant impact on the Earth’s climate.  The report concludes that evidence for climate changes based on solar radiation can be traced back as far as the Industrial Revolution.

Science, politicized.  By the left, of course.

Airlines have decided that fighting global warming is $10 billion too far and have pushed back.  Ecocrite Richard Branson is not quoted, I wonder why?

CO2 is killing the maple syrup industry.  Oh, wait, nevermind.

Let’s assume to do as the greens recommend and take the bus or train to work.  Do you feel better about yourself?  Well don’t, that green transport ain’t all that green after all.

Cap and Bend Over is just a con, says Willem.

Hey, you know what would be even worse than global warming?  Global Cooling, that’s what.  Here’s why, crops hate the cold.

Americans, don’t spend that extra $27,000 you have under the mattress, your government wants it.

It’s the solar wind flow pressure, stupid.

the sun and wind

the sun and wind

Compact fluorescent lamps, not just toxic bombs, but useless for reading by, too.  Thanks, greens.

If you enjoy summer, you might be out of luck this year.

Government Motors is opening a new battery farm lab, and the super-secret plan is to copy the competition.  Reverse engineering we can believe in!

Gore’s greedy greenies make like Gordon Gekko. This item brought to you by alarmist alliterators anonymous.

Scaremongers tell us that unless we act, polar bears might die.  Meanwhile an Arctic researcher shot a polar bear.  Dead.  Statistics aren’t clear if drowning or do-gooders kill more bears, but it’s close.

put the rifle down, then you can study me

put the rifle down, then you can study me

Kalivornyans are too much into da solar power, ya.  Dis is a prahblem even da Governator don’t wahnt.

Japan sets climate goals and the BBC judges them.  Which ‘B’ is for biased exactly?

Global warming is so cool, it can do anything.

Spain, recently Obama’s poster-nation for green jobs and more recently underbussed for the epic fail as unemployment pushed 18%, will soon be building nukes.  Change you can believe in.

Math is hard, like awkward facts.  Domestic solar power by the numbers.

Remember the ice-free Arctic you were promised. Never happened.

Part Four: AGW in the News

The green economy.  Every time you hear those words, check your pocketbook.  Coming soon, global warming insurance.

Fear of climate change, in fact, has been the biggest boon in insurance industry history. Contrary to conventional wisdom, the insurance industry has no interest in minimizing future risks to the public, in climate change or in any other field. To the contrary, the more that risks exist and the more that the insurance industry can charge to insure against those risks, the larger the potential market for insurance industry products.

Messin’ with Texans.  Austin, TX has introduced an ordinance that makes a green audit of every home sold mandatory.  Or you’re a criminal.

Americans look forward to transport of the future, but instead of flying cars, we’ll all be driving micro-mini suicide boxes.

monster trucks of the future

monster trucks of the future

Which planet are you on? Kofi’s or the real one, because the two cannot be the same place, surely.

The heretic at the BBC behind the Blog of Bloom asks why Co2 is the bad guy, and discovers just how much allergy fun we can expect from global warming.

Danger, the National Post reports that a billion tonne iceberg is ‘stalking’ Baffin Island.  I’m not sure just how a restraining order can help against a billion tonne ice island, but stalking is stalking.

Back to the future.  Clotheslines are making a comeback, because nothing says progress like bird poop on your favorite shirt.

The OC gets its inner skeptic out for a viewing and lefty heads pop all over SoCal.

More media snarking at the media here.  Even the Boston Herald is getting on the skeptic bandwagon:

Professor Roy Spencer of the University of Alabama, in charge of the Aqua experiments, believes that the models confuse cause and effect — that cloud variations cause warming or cooling.   Global warming fundamentalists have largely ignored this work, but it should make clear that costly — and economy-dampening — emissions reductions are quite unjustified.

Britons elected many EU MP’s from the UKIP camp, a global warming skeptical party.

Google is said to be approaching renewable energy.  You know what would help it happen faster?  A click, that’s what.  If only there was something nearby to help…

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Cheerleaders get the raise awareness fevah for a new calendar and immediately flew to Aruba for the photo shoot.  It’s what Al Gore would do, so I don’t judge.

Part Five: Global Hottie

For a fourth incredible week I have a  global hottie that has a bona fide global warming link.  Aussie supermodel Miranda Kerr appeared on the cover of the Rolling Stone‘s Green issue.  That’s good enough for me, and so by default it’s good enough for you too.  Skeptics, please welcome Ms. Kerr to the weekly round-up, and give thanks to klockarman for the tip.

click for improved happiness

click for improved happiness

That’s a wrap, thanks for reading .